Open relationships don’t follow traditional dating norms. In many places, they’re still considered counter-culture, though attitudes are shifting. But no matter where you are, open relationships require structure—built on communication, mutual respect, and clear expectations. These are the very foundations that make them work.
Whether you’re new to open relationships or looking to strengthen your current dynamic, understanding key expectations and etiquette guidelines will help set you up for success.
Honesty, a Non-Negotiable Pillar
For many people in traditional relationships, the idea that open relationships must be built on honesty is almost unthinkable. Yet, nothing could be more true.
At the core of every successful open relationship is complete transparency. Unlike monogamy, where exclusivity is often assumed, open relationships require continuous, open conversations. Everyone involved should feel confident that their partners are being truthful about their intentions, emotions, and boundaries.
Because honesty is so central, a lack of it can lead to turbulence—and often, to what amounts to cheating. Yes, cheating can happen in open relationships. It happens when someone breaks the agreements they’ve made, whether through dishonesty, secrecy, or omission.
That’s why open communication isn’t just a courtesy—it’s a requirement. And it doesn’t just apply between primary partners but also with secondary partners. Everyone deserves clarity and respect. Alignment on expectations is what keeps things running smoothly.
Keeping secrets, bending the truth, or omitting key details creates distrust and weakens the foundation of the relationship. And yes, this includes social media. Flirty conversations with an old flame on Facebook might not fly with your partner—just like in a monogamous relationship. The key is knowing and respecting the boundaries you’ve both agreed on.
Defining Boundaries: You Can Never Be Too Clear
Some couples are comfortable discussing every detail of their outside connections, while others prefer discretion. Some have specific rules around physical intimacy, emotional involvement, or how often they engage with new partners. No two open relationships look the same, but they all rely on one crucial factor: clearly defined boundaries.
The more clarity you have, the fewer misunderstandings you’ll face. In an open relationship, you can never be too specific when setting expectations.
Jealousy, Don’t Sweat It – Instead, Handle It
Even in the most secure open relationships, jealousy can still creep in. Let’s be honest—jealousy can wreak havoc in any relationship, even in the workplace or among friends. The key difference in open relationships isn’t the absence of jealousy—it’s how you handle it.
As we’ve written before, jealousy in open relationships is completely normal. What matters most is how you respond to it.
Instead of ignoring or suppressing those feelings, it’s important to acknowledge them and communicate openly. Ask yourself: What triggered this emotion? Am I afraid of being replaced? Does a certain dynamic feel unbalanced?Identifying the root cause allows partners to reassure each other and make necessary adjustments.
One of the most powerful tools for overcoming jealousy is embracing compersion—the joy of seeing your partner happy with someone else. While compersion may not come naturally at first, shifting your mindset in this direction can significantly ease jealous feelings over time. The more you focus on the positive aspects of your open relationship, the less space jealousy has to thrive.
What Time Is It?
Time for a watch, as they say. In the case of open relationships, it might be more likely a calendar is needed.
One challenge of open relationships is ensuring that all partners feel prioritized and valued. This requires strong time management skills and a willingness to balance different relationships without neglecting anyone.
Scheduling dates, maintaining quality time with a primary partner (if applicable), and checking in with all partners regularly can prevent feelings of neglect or imbalance. Open relationships don’t mean unlimited time and energy—being intentional about how time is spent makes a big difference.
By managing time with partners, you help reduce instances of miscommunications and cases of paranoia. Because when people feel slighted by how much you see them, its a recipe for feeling insecure about how you feel regarding them.
Open relationships function best when built on trust, communication, and mutual respect. By following key etiquette principles—such as honesty, clear boundaries, and emotional awareness—you create a healthier, more fulfilling experience for everyone involved.